So I did the math, and I’ve been in Berlin for more than four weeks now. It hasn’t quite been one month (although I’m only short of that mark by a day) but it has been enough time for me to realize: this is home.
Of course, there are still some things that needed to be sorted out – namely the VISA situation – but I really feel as though I belong here.
However, I am almost amazed at how seamless the transition has been. I was expecting a few more bumps in becoming acclimated, but… my bedroom feels like it’s mine, it is as though I’ve grown up in this neighborhood, and everything about Berlin feels like a natural extension of who I am.
In regards to homesickness, I have experienced it, but not quite like I expected. I don’t miss specific things about California yet, nor do I miss specific people. That feels silly to say; of course I miss my family and friends, but not in an aching kind of way. I miss their everyday presence in my life, but I am functioning just fine in the day-to-day.
What I am missing, though, is that sense of being surrounded. Even during the times when I felt the most lonely, I always had people to call or spend time with. I never had to be alone, unless I truly wanted it.
That isn’t the case here though. While I have a few close friends here (namely O. and F.) and have begun to establish my social circle even more, it’s nothing like back home, and I’m learning to cope with having to be alone, even if it’s not what I want at a particular moment. Still, the loneliness comes in waves, and it is totally expected, so I am not having too difficult a time coping with it. And whenever I start to feel sad, I just stay busy; it’s keeping busy that is distracting me.